こんにちは。pepeneeです。今日は、以前好評いただいた”pepeneeが失敗したもの4選”をまた別の形で皆さんとシェアしたいと思います。最後まで楽しんでいってくださいね。
hello. It's pepenee. Today, I would like to share with you another version of the previously well-received "4 things that pepenee failed at". Please enjoy it till the end.
①読書と、勉強のし過ぎで目が悪くなる。
①My eyesight is getting worse from reading and studying too much.
統合失調症に罹ってから、社会復帰の為、勉強をしまくった記憶があります。日商簿記3級の受験から、行政書士、社会保険労務士、中小企業診断士の資格を様々な形で受験しました。当時は、介護福祉士でしたので、一日の労働時間は残業有で９～１０時間。そこから、人生哲学、仕事の効率を上げるスキル、自己啓発の本、等々様々な読書と資格の学習をほぼ毎日していました。朝出勤するとき、目を覚ますと読んでいた本が開きっぱなし、音声学習のイヤホンをつけっぱなしみたいなことはざらにありました。３２歳から介護福祉士を取って、４４歳までのフルタイムまでの時間は、ほとんどフルタイム労働と、学習、自己啓発に当てていたのを覚えています。
After suffering from schizophrenia, I remember studying a lot in order to reintegrate into society. From taking the Nissho Bookkeeping Level 3 exam, I took various exams to qualify as an administrative scrivener, social insurance labor consultant, and small and medium-sized business consultant. At the time, I was a care worker, so my daily working hours were 9 to 10 hours, including overtime. From there, I studied sbout life philosophy, skills to improve work efficiency, self-development books, and other various readers and qualifications almost every day. When I went to work in the morning, there were many times when I woke up to find that the book I was reading was still open, and the audio learning earphones were still on. I started working as a care worker at the age of 35, and I remember spending most of my time working full-time, studying, and self-development until I was 44.
さて、その結果。得ることが出来たのは、介護福祉士と介護支援専門員（ケアマネジャー）。膨大な医療知識と哲学知識。得ることが出来なかったのは、行政書士、社会保険労務士、中小企業診断士。すべて不合格、もしくは学習時点で挫折。恐ろしく勉強したその先に、たしかにケアマネジャーとしてフリーランスを手に入れた側面もありますが、この十何年にわたる過酷な学習スタイルで、現在48歳ですが、目が悪くなりました。視力は1.5から0.6に下がり、また、目がしょぼしょぼ開けづらいです。勉強ばかりする受験生がみんな眼鏡をかけているイメージがありますが、最近ようやっと意味が解りました。たくさんの知識、ライセンスを手に入れる代わりに、視力が落ちるという事は、どうなんでしょう？皆さんも、勉強のやりすぎには気を付けてくださいね。
Well, the result. What I was able to obtain were a certified care worker and a care support specialist. Vast amount of medical and philosophical knowledge. What I was unable to obtain were an administrative scrivener, a social insurance labor consultant, and a small and medium-sized business consultant. I failed all of them, or gave up at the point of learning. After studing horribly, I did get a freelance job as a care support specialist, but I'm now 48 years old and my eyesight has deteriorated due to the harsh learning style I've had over the past 10 years. My visual acuity has decreased from 1.5 to 0.6, and I have difficulty opening my eyes. I have the impression thet all test takers who study all the time wear gasses, but recently I finally understood the meaning of this. What if your eyesight deteriorates in exchange for gaining a lot of knowladge and licenses? Everyone, please be careful not to study too much.
②新車を買う事にこだわる。
②I'm particular about buying a new car.
僕は、車が大好きでした。最初に車を買ったのは、統合失調症前の25歳前後。日産のウイングロードでした。当時、新車で200万円はしたのではないでしょうか。新車を購入すると、とても気持ちいいし、周囲の目も車の話をしに来てくれます。自己肯定感が上がるのです。その後、五年おきくらいに車を買い替え、新車で現在の日産ノートE-power を6年乗っています。かれこれ、三台も車を新車購入している計算です。合計出費は700万円くらいだと思います。もちろん、自分の稼いだお金から購入しているのですが、今考えたら、700万もあれば、マイホームも買えたな、と思います。中古でリフォームするなら、700万円でそこそこの家が手に入る時代です。新車にこだわって、人生の一番の浪費は車ってちょっと悲しいな、と最近思います。
I loved cars. I bought my first car when I was around 25, before my schizophenia. It was a Nissan Wingroad. At that time, a new car probably cost 2 million yen. Buying a new car feels great, and people around me come to talk to me about it. It increases my self-confidence. After that, I replaced my car about every five years, and I've been driving my current Nissan Note e-Power for six years now. It is estimated that I has burchased three new cars. I think the total expenses were around 7 millinon yen. Of course, I bought it with the money I earned, but now that I think about it, I think I could have bought my own home with 7 million yen. If I renovate a used house, I can get a decent house for 7 million yen. I've been obsessed with buying new cars, and lately I've been thinking that the biggest waste of my life is cars, which is bit sad.
③統合失調症を克服する為、体を鍛えすぎた。
③In order to overcome schizophrenia, I trained my body too much.
統合失調症を自己流で治癒しようと、とにかく運動をしまくりました。ランニング、ウォーキングの有酸素運動から、筋トレの無酸素運動。やりまくりました。五キロのランニングは若い時ほぼ毎日していたし、筋トレは、ランニング後腕立て伏せ、懸垂をしていました。現在は、ウォーキングを一日一時間、筋トレは週に一回腕立て伏せをしています。しかし、これもやりすぎはやっぱり禁物なんですね。胸や背中に筋肉がつきすぎて着れる服が減りました。マッチョというより、最近はゴリラが一番しっくりきます。近所の男の子にゴリラ～と言われたのは、なかなかショックでした。また、有酸素運動も、ランニング、ウォーキングをやりすぎて現在、膝の痛みが治りません。筋肉をつけてランニング、ウォーキングをすると膝に負荷がかかります。有酸素運動をする際は、膝の調子を見て、自分のペースで行ってください。膝は痛めるとなかなか元には戻りません。
In an attempt to cure my schizophrenia on my own, I exercised a lot. From aerobic exercise such as running and walking to anaerobic exercise such as muscle training. I did it a lot. When I was young, I used to run 5km almost every day, and for muscle training, I would do push-ups and pull-ups after running. Currently, I walk for an hour a day and do push-ups once a week. However, it is also prohibited to overdo this. I have gained so much muscle in my chest and back that I can wear fewer clothes. Rather than macho, gorilla suits me best these days. It was quite a shock when a boy in my neighborhood called me a gorilla. Also I do too much aerobic execise, running and walking, and now my knee pain is not going away. When you build muscle and run ro walk, you but stress on your knees. When doing aerobic exercise, check the condition of your knees and do it at your own pace. Once your knee is injured, it will never recover.
④世の為、人の為生きる、と信念を貫きすぎた。
④I stuck to my belief that I would live for the world and for people.
幼い頃から、母に神仏に手を合わせる事を教わっていた私。”世の為、人の為に役立つ生き方をしなさい”とずっと言われて育ってきました。もちろん、世のため人の為に生きてきた自信があります。後悔もありません。他者を助け、弱き者を助ける人生だったと振り返り、また、納得できるものでもあります。しかし、生き方は千差万別。私の信念は、私だけの信念。誰に強制できるものでもありません。もし、この信念が無かったら、今度の人生は、自分の好きな事をやる人生も悪くないな、と思ったりもします。信念を持たないのも人生。無宗教で生きるのも人生。それは、その人その人が自由に考え、行動していく価値観なのだと思います。現在では、自分のやりたいことが、そのまま誰かの役に立つ事が理想だとそう思うようになっています。
From an early age, my mother taught me to join hands with the gods and Bubbha. Growing up, I was always told to "live a life that is useful for the world and for others."Of course, I am confident that I have lived my life for the sake of the world and for people. I have no regrets. I can look back on my life of helping others and helping the weak, and it makes sense. However, there are many different ways of living. My beliefs are my own beliefs. It's not something that can be forced on anyone. If I didn't have this belief, I might think that my next life could be spent doing what I like. Life is also about not having beliefs. Living without religion is life. I believe that these are values that allow each person to think and act freely. Nowadays, I feel that the ideal thing to do is to do what I want to do and be of help to others.
終わりに。
前回、ご好評いただいた、失敗したものシリーズ。今回も人生の半分を折り返した私の失敗談から、笑い飛ばしてくれるのも良し、なにか教訓になったものがあるのも良し。皆さんのお役に立てれば幸いです。
At the end.
The series that failed last time was well received. It's good that you can laugh about my failures, which turned half of my life around, and it's also good that I learned something from them. I hope this will be of help to you.
